The Loss of Time & the Art of Surviving

Lost Time & The Art of SurvivalI find it hard to believe that it’s been 4 months since my last blog post.

I have plenty to say, but three jobs, karate, swimming, financial stress — and doing my best to be a good dad and husband have left me tired and out of time.

Blogging, which was once done 3X per week, is now perpetually on the back burner. And this makes me sad.

I’ve recently started exercising and meditating again, which is helping me hold everything together. 15 minutes here, 10 minutes there, I feel like a thief stealing time that no longer belongs to me.

Survival trumps just about everything. But if all we focus on is survival, then we’re essentially standing still — or worse sinking in metaphorical quick sand. Yuck.

So, how do we get unstuck?


Especially moving our eyes up & over the junk that lies before us. If we can look past the junk, we can see where we’d like to go. Once we accomplish this, we can take steps to get there. I’ve gotten into the habit of doing one or two major things each week to move my progress forward. And inch by inch, I am moving closer to my goals.

You can do this, too. I know you can. The trick is to stop thinking about it, and start doing it. Put it on the schedule — actually on your calendar — and do it.

Start today. Even if it’s only for 3 minutes.

And remember, you are not alone …

Time: The Slippery, Fleeting Thing That Doesn’t Really Exist

I recently read two posts about the issue of time over at Dad of Divas (see links below). It’s a topic I think about often how I’m spending my time, and how most of it is spent away from my family.

What is time?
We’re told it’s a man-made concept, that it doesn’t really exist. Yet there never seems to be enough of it. And whether or not it’s “real,” there are certain pressures, constraints and sacrifices inherent in the time paradigm.

My definition of time has a pretty bleak side. Time is life. And as we grind out the days and weeks away from our families (albeit in order to support them), there is something irreplaceable being sacrificed. Time with our kids. At the park. At music class. As they grow up. One day they’ll be adults, and we won’t be able to catch up with what we’ve lost.

Monday through Friday, like many moms and dads, my time is spent away from my family away from my kids  at work. That’s 10.5 hours per day, 52.5 hours per week, 2,572.5 hours per year (I’ve deducted 3 weeks vacation). And I know parents who have it worse  working 12+ hours per day, and weekends too!

When I’m home with my boys, I’m usually so exhausted that it’s a struggle to be present and pleasant. There’s not enough time in the day for me to get enough rest. So I’m left feeling like a vampire has sucked the blood (and the life force) out of me, leaving me in a semi-zombie state. Does this sound like you? I doubt I’m alone.

I’m sorry to say I do not have a cure-all answer for this dilemma that so many of us face. What I do know is this we can’t give up. We need to trust in the Universe and do our part to find a solution. Pray. Play the lottery. Make the best of our time with our kids (as hard as that may seem). Do whatever you have to do to avoid giving up. If you give up, all is lost. If you keep the faith, anything is possible.

If I did have a cure-all answer for the issue of time, it would look a lot like this:

I would clone myself into 5 people.

#1 Sleeps all day
#2 Spends all day with the kids
#3 Makes love with my wife all day
#4 Works all day
#5 Blogs about the other four

I think this would work out pretty well.

And remember, you are not alone…

Dad of Divas links:
Maniverse #5: Time in a Bottle
Blogging: Pastime or Addiction