Make a Date with Destiny: Schedule a Deadline for Your Goals
I used to think that setting a specific date on my goals was unrealistic. I felt that I’d accomplish what I set out to do when I was done, and that a definite completion date was forcing the issue, and would cause too much pressure.
Boy was I wrong.
For years I have set one-year and five-year goals for myself, but there was a time when the specifics of my “due date” were relegated to a statement like, “a year from now I will have accomplished my goal of (insert specifics here).”
One day it dawned on me that each time I stated my goal, along with the fact that I’d accomplish it one year from now, I was always the guy who would accomplish his goal ONE YEAR FROM NOW. I was never getting any closer to the due date because as each day passed, my deadline kept extending to exactly one year.
Placing an actual date on my goal moves me closer to the deadline each day. And as we all know, when a deadline we’ve committed to draws closer we get moving in an effort to accomplish our goal (or project). The pressure of an oncoming deadline creates the momentum necessary to accomplish it. Otherwise, it’s just too far away to take seriously.
Even if you’ve discovered what it is you want, defined it clearly and set attainable steps toward accomplishment – without a specific completion date, we’re far less likely to get where we want to go. Without that date, how do we set milestones or a timeline of when we need to have each step of the process done?
The pressure I was once so afraid of creating is actually a key ingredient to success.
What if a deadline arrives and we haven’t accomplished our goal?
Then we need to reassess and figure out why we weren’t able to accomplish our goal. At that point we can refocus our efforts on the goal, set a new plan and a new completion date.
Check out the following links for more details on goals:
– A Fresh Look at Goals for Parents, Kids and the Family
– The Magic If: Do you Know What Your Future Looks Like?
– Life is Like a Cup of Coffee
And remember, you are not alone …
A Quote from Buddha on Taking Action in Life
“I do not believe in a fate that falls on men however they act; but I do believe in a fate that falls on them unless they act.”
Many of my long-time readers may know that back in January of 2008, I posed the question: Was Buddha a Schmuck for leaving his family to find enlightenment? Aside from what I believe to be a poor parenting decision, Buddha’s contribution to our spiritual lives has been immense.
Here, he’s asking if we’re taking the actions we need to in order to create the life we really want. Are we teahing our kids to do the same? Or are we playing it safe, waiting until “tomorrow,” to take action where it’s needed?
Our future is contingent on the actions we take today. Whether we realize it or not, our children are watching us closely. What are they learning?
And remember, you are not alone …
Work is Not a Four-Letter Word
Well actually it is, but not in the way you think.
Until recently, when I thought of work it had a negative connotation.
I think many people perceive work as unpleasant, dreadful or boring – not to mention life-draining. But work is not a negative or an expletive. Nor is it innately bad.
It’s the ruts and the patterns we allow ourselves to fall into that are negative.
I started to become aware of my own negative perception of the word when I began working from home back in January. As I build my speaking career and freelance writing business, I block off certain times of the day to “work.” I soon noticed that I had a problem with the word. All sorts of negative connotations were attached to it – most of them including feelings of pain, suffering and misery.
I tried to re-name work, to help create a more positive perception in my mind. The best I could come up with was “Personal Achievement,” which only reminded me that I was trying to avoid the word work. In other words, re-naming work didn’t work.
Point being, if we find our work pleasant, fulfilling and it helps us move toward goal achievement (other than just making money), it’s certainly going to feel and be positive. If our work does not provide us with these things, we need to take a fresh look at our goals, and do our best to get back on track to the life we want.
In my “four letter word” series, my goal is to change the perception some of us may have about certain words. In doing so, I hope that we can create a shift in perception that leads to a shift toward a more happy, fulfilling life.
Words have power because of the meaning we imbed within them.
And remember, you are not alone …
Daddy Brain Speaks
When I began blogging in 2007, I had no idea that it would affect my life in so many positive ways. It is an honor to have had the opportunity to speak about modern-day dad issues on the radio, at conferences and in print. The greatest honor of all has been helping dads.
Somewhere along the way, I discovered my goal of becoming a speaker. I am happy to say that this dream has come true.
Through research, ongoing studies, personal experience and partnering with experts, I have developed workshops and seminars that help dads, students and professionals lead happier, more fulfilling lives.
If you’d like learn more about what I do, please visit Joey Guido Speaks, or give me a call @ 608-216-6760.
And remember, you are not alone …
Businessmen with Integrity, Part 1: The Asphalt Man
In this series, I’ll be sharing stories about local business men and business women who possess rich amounts of integrity.
It’s a trait I like to cultivate in my children and myself. I also look for it in the businesses I work with and make purchases from.
Problem is, quite often the businesses I have frequented or hired for services have fallen short of my expectations. So when a company or professional exceeds them, I like to tell everybody I know about them.
This summer we decided to have our driveway repaved. After four years of Wisconsin winters it was overdue.
I hired a man named Steve Smith of Badger Asphalt to do the work. He gave me a fair price, did an excellent job, and took some time to educate me about asphalt (this was actually more interesting than it sounds).
When a couple of the cracks Steve filled re-cracked, I gave him a call. He came back to my home with a smile on his face and retouched them all. When I called him back two weeks later to tell him the retouch wasn’t matching the rest of the driveway, he arrived at my home within the hour and fixed the problem. (Note: traditionally the crack filler goes on first because it’s shiny. Then the flat black liquid asphalt goes on top).
Again, Steve had a smile on his face, and was glad to do the work. He never complained, or asked me for more money. Steve did his job well, and he did it with integrity. I admire him for that.
If you happen to live in or around Madison, WI, and need your driveway repaved, I think you’ll be happy with Steve Smith of Badger Asphalt. Tell him Daddy Brain recommended you.
You can reach him at: 608-242-4089.
And remember, you are not alone …
Star Wars Episode 7: Dads are not Droids
A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away …
… Daddy Brain’s children thought he was a droid.
At least that what it seems like sometimes. Like most kids, mine are constantly demanding my attention – either to play, eat, bathe, or break up an argument about something that nobody will remember 20 minutes from now.
All in all, I love my role as a Work At Home Dad. But alas, I am not a droid. I can not recharge my battery in one hour like my iPhone. And I struggle with processing all the input that streams into my brain all day long. Working on growing my speaking career, caring for my boys, my wife and myself – not to mention actually mowing the lawn every once in a while is a constant struggle. And it’s exhausting.
I was speaking with a friend the other day and he told me that my quest for “balance” was impossible – especially if I’m constantly trying to have a balance between work, family and self on a daily basis. I think he’s right. Quite frankly, everything is cyclical – whether I want it to be or not. Sometimes the focus needs to be on work. Other times on play.
Above all, I need to recognize when my wife or kids need me. Although this is paramount over the former two things, it’s sometimes difficult because it involves being flexible. And being flexible means occasionally letting go of what I have planned. Finally, I need to make sure I take good care of myself so I can do all of these things well, and have a clear head to know where to direct my attention first.
Like my good friend, R2D2 the astromech droid, all I can do is my best.
May the force be with you.
And remember, you are not alone …
Acting with Kindness & Patience isn’t Always Easy …
The other day I got to thinking about how I’d like to treat my family vs. how I actually treat them. I found a disparity between the two, and realized I have some work to do if I want to give my wife and boys more of the following:
– Respect
– Love
– Understanding
– Wisdom
– Knowledge
– Belief in themselves
– Nurturing
– A feeling of being protected
– A feeling of being cared for
– Financial comfort
I share these thoughts with you because in the face of exhaustion and stress, it’s sometimes easy to lose sight of what’s most important in our lives. Taking a moment to be mindful about how we treat our family can help us refocus.
The result? A happier, healthier personal (not to mention professional) life.
And remember, you are not alone …
Embrace Your Freedom (or Happy 4th of July)
July 4th, 2010
This morning, I got to thinking about the freedom we have in our country.
Unlike with communism or a dictatorship, where there is less choice, Americans have the freedom to create and live the life of their dreams.
But there’s a problem.
Although America offers people freedom, many people shackle themselves within the belief of limitation – that they are either not worthy or not capable of fulfilling their personal legend. Even though they’re given freedom, they accept tyranny. And they are their own tyrant.
Even though I’m a motivational speaker and I believe that anything is possible, I sometimes fall into the trap of limitation. It’s an ugly trap that tries to push away the things we want, and make us believe that the attainable is out of reach. On this 4th of July I wanted implore you to listen to your heart, not the lie of limitation, and follow your dreams. If you don’t know what they are, click here to figure them out.
Remember, at one time America was the little guy, while Britain was a powerful country. Odds were that we were going to lose. Yet we still won our freedom, the very freedom you hold in your hands today.
What will you do with yours?
Even if you feel like an underdog, you have the power and the right to live your dreams.
And remember, you are not alone …
The Daddy Brain Workshop Series
The Daddy Brain Workshop in Madison, WI
Three 1-hour sessions focusing on issues that concern dads:
DAD’S EMOTIONAL LIFE
Wednesday, May 12th from 6-7 pm
Traditionally, dads have not been encouraged to talk about their emotions. But feelings like frustration, inadequacy, stress, sadness & fear need to be addressed, not suppressed.
DISCIPLINE
Thursday, May 20th from 6-7 pm
Positive and negative forms of discipline are discussed, as well as how we treat our kids on a daily basis (beyond discipline). Brain development is also touched upon.
GOALS FOR DADS, KIDS AND THE FAMILY
Thursday, June 3rd from 6-7 pm
How to define, set and attain goals – even in the face of obstacles like exhaustion, negative emotions, lack of time and stress.
All workshops are @ The Madison Public Library, Sequoya Branch. 4340 Tokay Blvd, Room A. To reserve your seat, or for more info, call Joey @ 608-216-6760, or e-mail daddybrain@live.com.
Have a group that would benefit from these workshops? I offer 1-day sessions and can travel to your town – wherever that might be. Feel free to e-mail or call me to discuss.
And remember, you are not alone …
Daddy Brain 
