How Much Value?
How much value would you put on a dad’s relationship with his children?
Could you put a price on it? Considering that this relationship is going to have a huge impact on that child’s future?
I’d say it has incredible value.
From the relationships that our sons and daughters will form, to the types of people they will marry, dad’s influence has a huge impact. A child’s relationship with his or her dad will play a big role in how they perceive themselves throughout their lives, and how successful they’ll be as professionals and as human beings.
So why aren’t dads supported, encouraged and challenged to be better dads? Instead of being insulted, degraded, and dishonored by the media, the court system, society — and even their own families?
What kind of seed is this planting in the minds of future fathers? Not to mention our kids?
The good news is that, as of late, there has been a transition manifesting in the media. There’s a commercial running on TV from Foundation for a Better Life with a hockey player singing to his daughter, which speaks volumes about a man’s ability to be a good dad — even in the face of ridicule. Two current films also portray dad in a positive light: The Descendants with George Clooney, and We Bought a Zoo with Matt Damon.
Dads are a tremendous value to their kids. More support will only mean better lives for the entire family.
And remember, you are not alone …
Daddy Brain 
I’d say it’s priceless – and that goes for any parent, regardless of “stripe”! Let’s hear it for dads!
@ Bill: Agreed! Now how do we convince the marketing execs who don’t have a clue?
babbo
These are the same marketing execs that exploit women to sell stuff, so I won’t be holding my breath. They just do whatever converts most effectively to sales. Courts and society, however, are more worthy targets for transformation.
At the grassroots level, every dad can be a visible role model and make a tangible difference in the lives he touches.
I happen to think the marketing exec are spot-on. I hold absolutely no illusions as to my role in any of the major decisions made in our family. If you want to sell something to us, pitch it to my wife. If you pitch it to me and I want to buy it, I’m just going to have to ask my wife if it’s OK anyway.
-Dork Dad
@ DorkDad: IF you’re serious, who is responsible for you being in this role in your household? You don’t seem happy about it. But my point goes beyond who makes decisions on purchases. Are you and your wife equally engaged in decisions concerning your child? And how do you feel about dads being portrayed as dorks (no pun intended)?
Peace,
babbo
Hah. No. I say it tongue firmly in cheek. I have a fantastic marriage where my opinion is welcomed as much as any other husband’s. Get a room full of husbands/dads and I’m sure there’s plenty of humor to be had about men being “equally engaged in decisions”. But it’s just humor. (//looks over shoulder at wife “I promise honey”)
Although I define “dork” a little differently, frankly I think men deserve a lot of the derision they get. Those of us who care enough to be thoroughly engaged in our domestic responsibilities to blog naturally gravitate to one another, and it’s easy to look around a discussion forum of like-minded engaged fathers and think that we aren’t being fairly represented. But in my experience, we are a small subset of the sperm-donor species, the majority of which deserves every bit of derision, mockery and criticism it gets.
Take a poll of who’s volunteering in the classroom, or who’s reading books at night, or who’s holding hands with their daughters, or who’s talking to sons about women — it’s the mothers. Just look at the role the NFL and S.I. Swimsuit Edition play in our society. I could cite countless observations from my yeasrs as a school teacher to further support the point.
Men, as a species, have dropped the ball domestically. We have only ourselves to blame. Naturally we few who do it right take exception, but we are the minority. It doesn’t make our protrayal in the media acceptable, but it does make it understandable.
-Dork Dad
@ DorkDad: First of all, happy holidays. Secondly, has dad really dropped the ball, or have they been conditioned to act a certain way? Are their habits derived from internal cues, or from acting out what’s expected of them from society and the media? My opinion is that it depends on the dad.
But every great change originates from one thought brought into action. We are that action. May our impact go far in making a positive difference.
Thanks for the awesome comments!
babbo
That said, let me go down on the record as saying I think the role of a father goes beyond measure. I will even go so far as saying I believe a strong/positive father-figure makes ALL the difference in the upbringing of a child, and the value of a “home”.
-Dork Dad
I think the value gets underplayed in the media in so many different ways as babbo was eluding to. But then we’re seeing that swing in the other direction too. It’s priceless, to have a dad in your life. So thanks for posting it, and thanks for being a dad….
Scott
@ Scott: You are very welcome, Sir. Thank you for your comment!
Peace,
babbo
You can’t put a value on it. Just as you cannot put a value on being a mother.. wait there’s been numbers out there…
As a father to a 6 month old I firmly believe that my son needs a man to look up to. Someone that can guide him towards the right direction.
The media has poisoned the role of a father but it is up to us, the great ones, to bring back the value of fatherhood.
@ Dad Versus: Very well said. Ultimately, the greatest power lies within us.
Peace,
babbo
I would say it requires a dad to be able to look ahead and see the value of investing in our children’s lives today so that they will be the beneficiaries tomorrow. These impact are not immediately apparent and it can be tempting for us to not place enough premium on it.
Invest today on a great relationship for their sakes so that they can be the next generation of better dads and moms.
Mark
Too bad the family courts see no value in fathers and often reduce them to nothing more then visitors and weekend fathers in their children’s lives. I once asked the mother of my child if she really wanted our son to grow up without his father. Her reply oh he will have plenty of other male role models in his life…